I was on my way home from the capitol the other night, trying to forget the frustrations of this never-ending budget process. Next thing I knew, red and blue lights were flashing in my rear-view mirror.
I pulled over and the officer approached the car, requested my license and registration, and told me he was stopping me for going 54 in a 35. He then asked whether there a reason I was speeding.
Now, here’s a guy, doing his job -- one that requires him to carry a gun for protection. He’s working over the holiday, just trying to keep our roads safe. Yet despite this reality check, it just happened…
“Yes. Yes, as a matter of fact there is a reason I’m speeding. You see, the state’s Constitution requires that last Thursday we were to have a budget for the Commonwealth, but it’s Tuesday and there’s still no budget. Not only did I miss the Fourth of July weekend for the third year in a row, but I'm supposed to be enjoying a five day vacation right now. But no! NO! I'm spending my vacation waiting in a non-air-conditioned capitol dome with a bunch of other sweaty bodies all waiting for the white smoke to rise signaling that there’s a new budget deal.”
“My life is at the whim of the government, and every day I drive back and forth for nothing. NOTHING! DID I MENTION THAT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE ON VACATION?”
I look him directly in the eyes.
“My family hasn't seen me, my poor dog thinks I’ve abandoned him and my cat won't look at me. O.k. he's just a cat, but when HE gets mad he urinates on my oriental rug!”
My mind momentarily wanders... maybe that’s how we can get business tax cuts…
“So, you ask if there's a reason I'm speeding?! Yes, I'm speeding because I just want to enjoy a little bit of time at the end of this beautiful holiday weekend by myself, away from the stresses of my profession! I WANT TO GET HOME!"
At that, the officer smiled and quietly returned to his car. Moments later he returned.
Pointing to a little black device on his shirt, he said, "This event has been recorded on audio and by a camera in the car should you have any concerns or require evidence of this traffic stop." At that, he handed me my fast driving award and concluded, "Please drive safely."
Well, I figure at least I provided the guys back at the station some laughs. And maybe, JUST maybe, my $135.50 speeding ticket can help close the budget gap and seal this deal before government shuts down.
Comments